The value and existence of turn signals

Without question, the most annoying, frustrating, nerve racking part of my life is driving my car. I have the grey hair to prove it. The staggering amount of horrible drivers on the road can make a peaceful Sunday drive through the country seem like a mission in Grand Theft Auto.

They'll give a license to anyone. Old people that drive too slow. Young kids who drive too fast. All you have to do is take a silly exam that asks you recognize what a stop sign looks like and your road ready. Proceed to the road test. If you're able to operate a car in a 15 foot area, where the only damagable objects are orange barrels and a few rusty shopping carts, you are ready to hit the highway, where the only damagable objects are telephone poles and my spinal cord.

The first thing my dad told me when teaching me to drive was to use my turn signal. Nothing pissed him off more and, in turn, nothing pisses me off more. Maybe the least difficult thing you can do, simply extend a finger and flick the lever. A simple hint for the guy coming up behind you. It says, "Hey I'm making a right here, don't try to swing around or you'll broadside me!" But so few people actually use them, you end up playing the guessing game. If you think i'm letting you out without signaling you are mistaken.

It's not just car drivers you have to worry about; bike riders can cause all sorts of trouble as well. Whether it's the Lance Armstrong wannabe or the extra from Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome on the chopper, they seem to think they own the road. And that's the trouble, they really do. Because they know you wouldn't dare get near them for fear of launching them off their bike like a botched Evel Knievel stunt. So the bicycler will ride on the road even when there's 6 feet of shoulder and Easy Rider will tail the corner of your bumper until it opens up enough that they can pass you on either side of the road or in extreme cases, the sidewalk.

There are several other minor things that can make my blood boil. Taking too long to make a turn. People who haven't learned how to merge onto the highway. Calculating your chances of beating a train because you're late for work. School buses.

It shouldn't be this bad; it takes effort to be a bad driver. Use your turn signal. Don't tailgate. Know the right of way. And let me know if you ever see a lady aware of her surroundings when she backs out of her spot at the Silver Spring Turkey Hill. That's on my Bucket List.